Nice Girls: Beware of the Holidays!

December 16, 2009
The holiday season can be a doubly whammy time for Nice Girls: you tend to do too much and eat too much. So, what's a Nice Girl to do to stay sane and eat sensibly during this time of year? Here are 10 tips: 1.Monitor your stress level, which means checking in with yourself often. If you're feeling overwhelmed, decide whether you need to take time out or reduce your activity level. Saying no to requests and invitations is a fine way to take care of yourself. And learn to delegate, delegate, delegate. 2.Don't plan on being perfect--a perfect eater, hostess, gift-giver--and you won't be disappointed. It's not your job to make people happy over the holidays. It's your job to make yourself happy (which sometimes makes others unhappy, but that's life!). 3.Keep to structure. One of the biggest mistakes Nice Girls make during the holidays is giving up routines such as going to the gym, reading, taking walks, getting enough sleep, and just having down time. We all need structure; it's protective. 4.Think of holiday events as social gatherings not feasts. Make talking to friends and family your focus, not the food. And remember, when you're talking, stop eating and when you're eating, stop talking. 5.If you're at a buffet, make sure to eyeball all the food first, then serve yourself. Choose your top 3-5 favorite foods and take a small helping of each. Same with desserts. Take a reasonable portion of your favorites only, or sometimes a taste is enough to do the trick. 6.Make sure to eat enough during the day of evening holiday dinners and parties. Starving yourself earlier in the day (or the day before) is a set up for bingeing and overeating. It's fine to cut back a little, but sabotage to walk around hungry. 7.If you're going to be with your family of origin, consider how whenever we're thrown into situations with them, lots of old childhood feelings and patterns can re-emerge: we feel invisible or like the odd woman out, we get anxious about family squabbles and feel pressured to be peace-maker, we fall into victim mode and forget we're full grown adults. Anticipate what feelings may crop up and problem-solve ahead of time how you'll handle them. 8.Make your own food choices and stick to your guns no matter who tries to cajole you into eating what. Stay in touch with your appetite and don't get pushed into eating this or that. Each as little or as much as you want. 9.Pay special attention to how you feel when you get home from holiday events. Nice Girls easily get disappointed and fixate on what didn't go well. In this emotional state, you're especially susceptible to nibbling and noshing. Sit with feelings and be kind to yourself. Hold a mindset of compassion and curiosity. Have a good cry or a good laugh at how silly people are. Feel whatever you're feeling and don't eat over your emotions. 10.If you're stuck in a situation and can't make a decision, think, "What would a NOT Nice Girl do here?" Thinking that way will open up options and help you get out of your own way. Happy Holidays! Best, Karen R. Koenig

Hey, there, Nice Girls

October 26, 2009
I really enjoyed writing NICE GIRLS FINISH FAT and hope you're enjoying/getting something out of reading it. If you'd like support in going from a Nice to a Less-Nice Girl, why not join my Nice Girls message board at And don't forget to read my weekly blogs at If you liked the book, you can help spread the word by writing a (hopefully 5-star) review of it on Best, Karen R. Koenig



Get a FREE eBook
when you join our mailing list!