Vote MY YEAR OF FLOPS by Nathan Rabin
My Life in 8 Words
Q. What is your motto or maxim?
A. I got a good Christian raisin' and an eighth grade education. Ain't no need in y'all treating me this way
Q. What trait is most noticeable about you?
A. my terrible posture and air of ineffable sadness
Q. What is your greatest achievement?
A. The Big Rewind, and keeping my two cats out of cat prison despite their many cat crimes
Q. How would you describe perfect happiness?
A. In my book I describe perfect happiness as drinking the still-warm blood of my friends from the hollowed-out skulls of my enemies. So I'm going to go with either that or hugging a newborn kitten.
Q. If you could acquire any talent, what would it be?
A. If I could change the channel on the TV without actually getting up and doing so manually, that would be almost inconceivably awesome.