Vote MY YEAR OF FLOPS by Nathan Rabin
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My Life in 8 Words
Q. What is your motto or maxim?
A. I got a good Christian raisin' and an eighth grade education. Ain't no need in y'all treating me this way
Q. How would you describe perfect happiness?
A. In my book I describe perfect happiness as drinking the still-warm blood of my friends from the hollowed-out skulls of my enemies. So I'm going to go with either that or hugging a newborn kitten.
Q. What trait is most noticeable about you?
A. my terrible posture and air of ineffable sadness
Q. What is your greatest achievement?
A. The Big Rewind, and keeping my two cats out of cat prison despite their many cat crimes
Q. If you could be any person or thing, who or what would it be?
A. To paraphrase Woody Allen, my only regret in life is that I am not someone else