Stuff
Interview with Rafraf Barrak
Interview with Rafraf Barrak
A Conversation with Don Teague and Rafraf Barrak, Authors of Saved by Her Enemy
1.) What finally motivated the two of you to sit down and put your story on paper?
Don: I was actually reluctant to write this book. Throughout this journey with Rafraf, friends or others who knew of the story would say “you should write a book or do a documentary.” I didn’t pursue either because I didn’t want Rafraf to feel that she was invited into our family for some journalistic or financial venture. I later realized people might truly learn something from our experiences, so I discussed the idea with Rafraf and ultimately made the decision to tell the story.
Rafraf: When I first came to the States, people were always asking me if I was keeping a journal and I wasn’t actually so when Don told me about the idea of the book, I thought it was great to replace a journal that I never wrote. And the fact that meeting different people through the 5 years I spent here got me to a point where I wanted to convey more about the world I come from to the people living here in the States. I was asked so many questions over and over and over and this book I hope will answer some of them in one way or another.
2.) What was your writing process? Which scenes were the most difficult to relay?
Don: The writing process was fairly simple, though occasionally painful. I would sit with Rafraf for hours on end, asking her detailed questions about her family, her life, her views on certain topics. I would then lock myself away and write…having Rafraf review chapters for accuracy as I completed them.
A typical conversation:
“You can’t say that about me,” Rafraf would say.
“But it’s true,” I reply. “You just told me that story yesterday.”
“But I didn’t mean for you to put it in the book,” she would plead, “People won’t understand. They’ll hate me.”
“Nobody’s going to hate you, Rafraf.”
Sometimes she won the argument…er, negotiation…sometimes I won.
For me, the most difficult scenes in the book are the ones that reveal my feelings about religion or other private matters. In my capacity as a journalist, I work hard to keep my views out of any reporting. In the context of this book, however, I’m a character. It would be unfair to the readers to present myself as a blank slate.
Rafraf: Sometimes Don would ask questions I don’t really want to answer or questions where the answer can lose its meaning if translated to English, so it was kind of difficult to just bridge the conversation clearly, but at the end when I read the chapters Don wrote, it made sense and the way he put it all together was fair, realistic and true to what really happened.
3.) What was it like to hear each other’s varying perspectives of these events? What was the most surprising thing that you learned?
Don: I was fascinated to hear what “shock and awe” was like from Rafraf’s perspective. I can’t imagine what it would be like to have all of those bombs falling around me.
Rafraf: A lot of things are still shocking and surprising to me even to this day. For example, people always asked me one question repeatedly, “What was it like, the war?” And that just made me think people wanted to learn from a direct source rather than listening to the news, whereas, when I was home all we did is listen to the news.
4.) How do you think your obvious abilities as communicators (Don is a news correspondent, Rafraf is a translator) helped you in writing this book?
Don: I’m a story teller. Television news is about telling stories in two minutes or less. It was both challenging and liberating to be able to tell a story over several hundred pages.
Rafraf: I was eager to learn more words, when I read the chapters as Don was writing because I always had the simplest style of writing trying always to avoid difficult or complicated words. Not to say his writing is complicated, but he uses big words that I learned to understand through always asking him about what these words mean.
5.) Do either of you envision a future in which you will return toIraq
Don: Kiki says I’m not going back toIraq
Rafraf: One day. I miss my family and my friends there.I always have hope that one day whether it’s back in Iraq or in some other place I will get to see them again.
6.) Why did you choose to end the book with Rafraf’s conversion?
Don: Rafraf’s decision to follow Christ happened during the writing of the book. It came as a surprise to me, and it obviously posed a question for the book. Our initial decision was not to include her conversion. The book was originally intended, among other things, to show how people of different faiths can co-exist…even within the same household. What’s more, as a “new Christian,” Rafraf may not have had the tools necessary to defend her decision against the inevitable attacks. Kiki, in particular, strongly believed it was best to let Rafraf mature in her faith before opening herself to such criticism, and even possible danger. We continued writing, planning to leave Rafraf’s decision out.
As the weeks passed, Rafraf began to feel strongly that her decision should be made public. She felt God working in her heart, and wanted others to know what that relationship was like.
We all prayed about the decision. We discussed and debated it with my agent, and my editor…both Christians. Both said while Rafraf’s testimony would be powerful, it was her decision to make. The success of the book would not rest on what she decided.
We all reminded Rafraf that there could be actual danger involved with revealing her decision. She remained resolved to include her conversion.
It would be dishonest to say we haven’t all had second thoughts about the decision to reveal Rafraf’s decision to accept and follow Christ. I have changed my mind on the subject a hundred times.
Ultimately, though, the truth should always win. We’re telling the truth, and leaving up to God to sort out the rest.
7.) Do either of you have any new projects planned?
Don: I always have projects planned. A new book? Yes. I’ve also written five screenplays, and am always in the process of telling the next story. I hope to leave myself out of the next one.
1.) What finally motivated the two of you to sit down and put your story on paper?
Don: I was actually reluctant to write this book. Throughout this journey with Rafraf, friends or others who knew of the story would say “you should write a book or do a documentary.” I didn’t pursue either because I didn’t want Rafraf to feel that she was invited into our family for some journalistic or financial venture. I later realized people might truly learn something from our experiences, so I discussed the idea with Rafraf and ultimately made the decision to tell the story.
Rafraf: When I first came to the States, people were always asking me if I was keeping a journal and I wasn’t actually so when Don told me about the idea of the book, I thought it was great to replace a journal that I never wrote. And the fact that meeting different people through the 5 years I spent here got me to a point where I wanted to convey more about the world I come from to the people living here in the States. I was asked so many questions over and over and over and this book I hope will answer some of them in one way or another.
2.) What was your writing process? Which scenes were the most difficult to relay?
Don: The writing process was fairly simple, though occasionally painful. I would sit with Rafraf for hours on end, asking her detailed questions about her family, her life, her views on certain topics. I would then lock myself away and write…having Rafraf review chapters for accuracy as I completed them.
A typical conversation:
“You can’t say that about me,” Rafraf would say.
“But it’s true,” I reply. “You just told me that story yesterday.”
“But I didn’t mean for you to put it in the book,” she would plead, “People won’t understand. They’ll hate me.”
“Nobody’s going to hate you, Rafraf.”
Sometimes she won the argument…er, negotiation…sometimes I won.
For me, the most difficult scenes in the book are the ones that reveal my feelings about religion or other private matters. In my capacity as a journalist, I work hard to keep my views out of any reporting. In the context of this book, however, I’m a character. It would be unfair to the readers to present myself as a blank slate.
Rafraf: Sometimes Don would ask questions I don’t really want to answer or questions where the answer can lose its meaning if translated to English, so it was kind of difficult to just bridge the conversation clearly, but at the end when I read the chapters Don wrote, it made sense and the way he put it all together was fair, realistic and true to what really happened.
3.) What was it like to hear each other’s varying perspectives of these events? What was the most surprising thing that you learned?
Don: I was fascinated to hear what “shock and awe” was like from Rafraf’s perspective. I can’t imagine what it would be like to have all of those bombs falling around me.
Rafraf: A lot of things are still shocking and surprising to me even to this day. For example, people always asked me one question repeatedly, “What was it like, the war?” And that just made me think people wanted to learn from a direct source rather than listening to the news, whereas, when I was home all we did is listen to the news.
4.) How do you think your obvious abilities as communicators (Don is a news correspondent, Rafraf is a translator) helped you in writing this book?
Don: I’m a story teller. Television news is about telling stories in two minutes or less. It was both challenging and liberating to be able to tell a story over several hundred pages.
Rafraf: I was eager to learn more words, when I read the chapters as Don was writing because I always had the simplest style of writing trying always to avoid difficult or complicated words. Not to say his writing is complicated, but he uses big words that I learned to understand through always asking him about what these words mean.
5.) Do either of you envision a future in which you will return to
Don: Kiki says I’m not going back to
Rafraf: One day. I miss my family and my friends there.I always have hope that one day whether it’s back in Iraq or in some other place I will get to see them again.
6.) Why did you choose to end the book with Rafraf’s conversion?
Don: Rafraf’s decision to follow Christ happened during the writing of the book. It came as a surprise to me, and it obviously posed a question for the book. Our initial decision was not to include her conversion. The book was originally intended, among other things, to show how people of different faiths can co-exist…even within the same household. What’s more, as a “new Christian,” Rafraf may not have had the tools necessary to defend her decision against the inevitable attacks. Kiki, in particular, strongly believed it was best to let Rafraf mature in her faith before opening herself to such criticism, and even possible danger. We continued writing, planning to leave Rafraf’s decision out.
As the weeks passed, Rafraf began to feel strongly that her decision should be made public. She felt God working in her heart, and wanted others to know what that relationship was like.
We all prayed about the decision. We discussed and debated it with my agent, and my editor…both Christians. Both said while Rafraf’s testimony would be powerful, it was her decision to make. The success of the book would not rest on what she decided.
We all reminded Rafraf that there could be actual danger involved with revealing her decision. She remained resolved to include her conversion.
It would be dishonest to say we haven’t all had second thoughts about the decision to reveal Rafraf’s decision to accept and follow Christ. I have changed my mind on the subject a hundred times.
Ultimately, though, the truth should always win. We’re telling the truth, and leaving up to God to sort out the rest.
7.) Do either of you have any new projects planned?
Don: I always have projects planned. A new book? Yes. I’ve also written five screenplays, and am always in the process of telling the next story. I hope to leave myself out of the next one.
