New from Simon & Schuster

Author Revealed

About Peter Lerangis

Q. What is your birthdate?

A. 8/19

Q. Previous occupations

A. Actor, Singer, Waiter, Copyeditor

Q. Favorite job

A. Singing waiter in Nantucket.

Q. High school and/or college

A. Freeport (New York) High School, Harvard College

Revealing Questions

Q. How would you describe your life in only 8 words?

A. Three decades without a salary and loving it.

Q. What is your motto or maxim?

A. Don't mess with Alternate-Side-of-the-Street Parking, and everything else will work itself out.

Q. How would you describe perfect happiness?

A. Final draft approved.

Q. What’s your greatest fear?

A. The draft isn't final after all.

Q. If you could be anywhere in the world right now, where would you choose to be?

A. Where the people are. Dancin', walkin'. (Also, Cabo San Lucas.)

Q. With whom in history do you most identify?

A. Plato, because he wrote in a cave and had a cool molding toy named after him.

Q. Which living person do you most admire?

A. Harold Camping. Because the mere mention of his name makes people laugh.

Q. What are your most overused words or phrases?

A. "he said" and "she said"

Q. What do you regret most?

A. Not learning to tap dance at a young age.

Q. If you could acquire any talent, what would it be?

A. Really good tap dancing.

Q. What is your greatest achievement?

A. Raising two sons who still tolerate me.

Q. What’s your greatest flaw?

A. My feet turn out and clip things to either side of me while I walk.

Q. What’s your best quality?

A. My eyebrows have not yet gone gray. I focus on them when I look in the mirror, and so should you.

Q. If you could be any person or thing, who or what would it be?

A. Any of the actors on the TV show LOST.

Q. What trait is most noticeable about you?

A. See three questions above this. Ow!

Q. Who is your favorite fictional hero?

A. Oscar Schmultz. I made him up when I was a kid. You would like him, I think.

Q. Who is your favorite fictional villain?

A. Lex Luthor, although "favorite" would kind of knock out the idea of a villain, wouldn't it?

Q. If you could meet any historical character, who would it be and what would you say to him or her?

A. "Duck, Mr. Lincoln."

Q. What is your biggest pet peeve?

A. People who crunch their voices at the ends of sentences.

Q. What is your favorite occupation, when you’re not writing?

A. Sleeping. Is there anything else?

Q. What’s your fantasy profession?

A. Paid retired astronaut.

Q. What 3 personal qualities are most important to you?

A. Pulchritude, indefatigability, insouciance. I think. I have to look them up first.

Q. If you could eat only one thing for the rest of your days, what would it be?

A. Avocado salad with tahini dressing. Wait. Sorry. Just had a bit of a spell. Chocolate chocolate-chip ice cream.

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